Jamie-Rose Sellar - Aged 14
A strong understanding of conventional horror results in a narrative that consistently raises questions. We enjoyed the visuals and inner monologue in this uniquely intense and creepy thriller. The setting and horror elements are effectively done, and the twist was genuinely eerie. Some excellent descriptive details give a real sense of the location in which the narrative unfolds. Overall, a very well written and captivating story. We want to know what happens next!
The files marked confidential read, 'Upon our recent visit Demetris has displayed signs of significant mental deterioration. His cognitive skills are rapidly declining, while further investigation is needed, we have come to the conclusion that a carer may need to be enforced'.
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Without reading the rest, Eline closes the folder and slides the plastic sleeve back over it, covering the information. She sighs and runs her fingers through her hair, turning her hand to inspect the time on her wrist watch, 4:20 am, she been at the laboratory for almost 24 hours, performing countless experiments that come to nothing, and this information has by no stretch bought her any joy.
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Lifting the medication bottle of the desk, she checks the label and dumps it in the bin beside her. She tries to process what to do next, but she's struggling to comprehend what this means for the company, and in desperate need of a break she stands up from her desk and bounds down the corridor, frantically knocking on the office of Mr Grenald, the CEO of the establishment. Without an answer, she impulsively decides to enter anyway, she's met with a disgruntled and extremely tired looking man, much how she imagines herself to look in this moment in time. Grenald looks up from his desk top and their eyes meet, his expression is blank, clear he has a lot on his mind.
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'Oh Eline,' his voice is filled with little expression, he gestures for her to take a seat adjacent to his desk 'How may I help?'
Eline sits down cautiously, she's always despised Grenald's dimly lit, bleak little nook of an office, she found his pea green walls and shelves full of poorly painted angel figurines disturbing at best. She places the folder on his desk and drums her fingers against her thigh.
'Well,' she gulps, ' straight to the point I guess, test subject 412 has officialy been classified as mentally disabled, I've had 3 psychiatrists report the same information , the last one suggested further investigation, although I think the evidence is conclusive,'
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She leans forward trying to read Grenald's emotion, he sits for a few seconds, his lips pressed into two thin lines. Stretching his hand across his face, Eline can see him trembling uncontrollably. He leans back trying to remain composed in front of his employee, but she knows he's desperately trying not to burst into tears.
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They sit opposite each other for a few seconds longer, the tension rapidly rising, Eline bows her head, a sudden but intense feeling of dread stabs her in the stomach and she feels as if she's pinned to her seat. In panic, she glances up to reveal Mr Grenald with his hand still upon his face but he seems odd, Eline has known this man for many years but something seems off.
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"Please Sir, I’d like to go now," she whimpers, her heart pounding so hard in her chest you can see it beating through her clothes. Her eyes dart around the room, desperately looking for an easy exit, but all the doors seem to be growing further from her, she feels her skin tightening around her chair, her flesh sticking tighter to her bones, her finger nails dripping with sweat.
And she looks up again.
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Mr Grenald's eyes are replaced with burning black coals, his upper jaw and lower jaw seems to be fusing shut, Eline's intellectual brain can't help but think she's hallucinating from sheer exhaustion, but it all seems so real. An unexpected sensation of breath against her skin forces her to squirm and wriggle, unable to escape, unable to scream, the frigid breath deliberately trailing down to the tip of her spine, as the lights turn of.
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Eline scrunches her eyes shut, tears uncontrollably streaming down her face as she fantasizes about being at home under the covers. Without warning, an enormous force pushes her head back, so far her neck begins to ache under the pressure, she refuses to open her eyes but she seems to have no choice on the matter, and she's met with a man’s face, surprisingly he doesn't seem angry or frustrated but instead composed, bathed in a warm white glow.
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He smiles softly his kind features are exaggerated in the light, his head cranes to the side, revealing a number burnt into his neck, '4..1..2'. In that moment she realises why this is happening to her.

