Angel Sparks - Aged 12
Told like a ghost story around the campfire, the playful characters, colourful descriptions, and scary twists make for the perfect spooky sleepover! The writer uses lots of great similes that create a fast pace in this truly magnificent adventure. We really enjoyed the plot twists and turns and the shift in tones throughout the tale. And we loved how the monster wasn’t scary in the end and was actually very well-mannered! Overall, this is a fantastically imaginative story that evolves from a camping trip into something magical! Your sense of fun shines through. Keep writing and exploring new ideas!
Molly and the Magnificent Adventures
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Hi I am Molly Wheat, and I have brown eyes, blonde hair, small feet and short legs. I I am 10 years old and three feet tall. I have three friends. My three friends are called Madi, Gabi and Ana. On night we decided to go camping all day all we did was go shopping eventually we told are parents we were going camping.
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Soon we all got tired so we had dinner which was sausages and jacket potatoes on a fire we went to bed. Me and Madi couldn’t get to sleep we tried and tried we just couldn’t sleep. I we decided to go on a walk. But so we did. We walked everywhere when we got back to the tent we heard a noise from behind. So we got out and looked and we saw eyes at first we thought it was bats so we got back into the tent and went back to sleep. We didn’t wake up. “Where are they?” wailed Gabi
“Where are they?” wailed Ana
It was morning and Madi and Molly were missing we even looked in the forest and everywhere else and we couldn’t find them.
I never knew what happens next would be better!
Time past and Molly and Madi were still gone
“I’m tired?!” Gabi whispered
SO we had dinner which was chicken, garlic bread, corn on the cob and skewers. Then for pudding we had smores. Then after we went to sleep.
By morning we were shocked to see that Molly and Madi were back.
“we missed you!” Gabi and Ana wailed
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“well at least we are back!” said Molly
“What do you guys want to play ? “
“ITTTTTTT please!!!” they all shouted
After it we were alll tired so we played monopoly for a bit.
After we finished monopoly we all had dinner which was chicken, jacket potatoes and garlic bread on a fire then we roasted marshmallows.
Before we went to bed we called our parents and spoke to them for a bit as we hadn’t seen them or heard from them in two days. The we went to sleep.
I wonder what will happens next.
Ana and Gabi could not sleep they tried and tried but it was impossible as they were worried and annoyed they were like a hamster at night in its wheel or on its seesaw.
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They only went into the forest but when they almost fell over they decided to go back to the tent and try to go back to sleep.
When they finally got back they couldn’t sleep still and they heard a noise behind the tent they went to check but they couldn’t se anything.
Read more to see what happens next!!!
Time past and Ana and Gabi were still missing.
“I’m tired” so we sat and had dinner which was left overs and then we cooked more chicken, garlic bread and corn on the cob. Then we went and roasted marshmallows to make smores and went to bed.
We went to sleep at and when we woke up in the morning we were surprised to see Ana and Gabi standing there.
We missed you!” Molly and Madi wailed
“well at least we are back!” said Gabi
“What do you guys want to play ?
“ hide and seekkkkkkkk? “ they all shouted
After playing for a while we decided to play hungry hippos as we were all tired from running around. Once we were done we rung our parents and told them how much fun we were having and told them how much we love them.
When we hung up we started a fire and cooked dinner which was jacket potatoes, sausages, garlic bread, corn on the cob and chicken. This time we could all sleep we weren’t worried or scared or missing OUR parents we just fine.
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Read more to find out what weird and wonderful things happen next.
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It was morning and there was a lump of fur in our tent.
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“what is it?” I asked
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“we don’t know!!” they said
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We sat and thought for a minute what could this lump be or this furry lump to be exact. Then we remembered it’s a monster that’s the thing that’s been lurking behind the tent.
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When it woke up, we asked it why was it in our tent and it replied by saying “because you came in my home” he said that the home he was on about was the forest.
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“is it you taking us?” we asked
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“yes!” he replied
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“can you stop please?” we said
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“yes but pls don’t come in my home again lol!!” he said we said OK we won’t come in your home as long as you don’t take us thank you very much.
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Read on to see if we become friends or enemies.
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Hey monster do u wanna play it with us.
“sure” he replied. Dinner was the same as last night plus chips, cheese and crackers and some other foods then for dessert we had ice cream, smores and some other yummy foods. After we had dinner and dessert we rung up our parents and told them the whole story about the monster our new friends alll of it then when we hung up then we played more games so board games and went to bed.
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READ MORE TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENS ON THE LAST Day!!!!!
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We woke up the next morning and had frosties and milk again. After breakfast we played games including one I made and I rung our parents said what time we would be coming back hung up and left on our ways. When they got home they decided to go on a adventure on there adventure they found an old abandoned shop. They decided to discover the next day and they invited one of their other friends Sophie.
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ENJOY THE NEXT PART READ ON TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!!!
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The next day they all met up. It was snowing and this is how there journey begins.
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As the wind howled fragments of snow covered all the rooftops and blanketed everything like a padded quilt. The fog crept up like a ghostly serpent, sliding along the window, flicking its tongue into the corners of the houses , waiting for a few moments and then sliding back along the path that everyone avoided.
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Skipping down the road, Sophie a small girl noticed a chalkboard. “what’s that” she wondered.(She had always been a curious child!) It was full of boring and beautiful names in all different styled handwriting. “do I add my name?” She thought noticing that the chalk was just lying there.
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Trembling like a hurricane she reached out her hand, not knowing if this was naughty or not.
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Bravely she picked up the chalk. Looking around her, she sneakily wrote her name. Sophie. Suddenly, she turned around and saw what looked like a reflection of herself, but soon she realized it was too small to reflect her.
A doll...it was a doll of her. But how could this be? As she turned towards to take a closer inspection of it, it had disappeared. Home. Vanished. Felling confused, she ran to the old, cracked and abandoned shop window, to see if it was still there. It was ...but I’m the antique table in the centre of the room. Desperate to get in, she ran to the door and wiggled the handle, with ferocity. “Why won’t it open?” She wondered. Disappointed, she walked away from the abandoned shop door, dragging her heels in the snow. But then a creak...the door had opened.
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Inside the shop the first thing that hit her was the nasty smell as if no one had been in there and the sight of shelves full of dolls. The shelves weren’t just full of dolls they were also full of dust. The walls had stains and dark patterns on them and the floors had carpets on which had chunks ripped out of it.
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“There’s no one here is it open?” She thought. Suddenly, something hit her foot. “What is that?” She wondered. It was a doll of a boy on a bike, she picked it up and it ran straight to the door. She looked around the rest of store the shelves had gathered more dust; they were squeaky and old.
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Suddenly, she spotted the doll of herself high up on a shelf, so hurriedly like a lion ready to catch it’s prayed, she climbed up the shelves, but she slipped. When she got back up, nervously and hurriedly as if she was reading in front of a whole school, she climbed back up the shelves. When she went to touch the doll, she was swallowed into it.
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Her friends watched as she completely disappeared.
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Looking around, the doll noticed another girl writing her name on the chalkboard. Then the girl turned around and realized the doll, but she got sucked in. Would this happen again

